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Del Gland
04-11-2005, 01:46 PM
15% of contributors to this thread refuse to get involved in the race for the Top Ten
ponypunter
04-11-2005, 01:50 PM
Originally posted by brighton_eagle
So i was playing and this game is crap???
awful post
Originally posted by Del Gland
15% of contributors to this thread refuse to get involved in the race for the Top Ten
The top ten posters to FMCDA at 3pm today all recieve all expenses paid trips to the Caribbean to promote the BBS.
A whip round of all other BBS members will fund the trip
Del Gland
04-11-2005, 01:54 PM
Originally posted by mik59
23% of all photocopier errors worldwide are caused by people photocopying their buttocks.
7% of the above have gone home and left their arses on the photocopier
mik59
04-11-2005, 01:54 PM
Due to his habitual mis-types, Great Gonzo's threads become much clearer when you appreciate that "Teh" means "cool" in Thai.
Jalfrezi_Enema
04-11-2005, 01:54 PM
Originally posted by DDD
J_E is 4/6 favourite to be the FMCDA Christmas number One
Yep, Me and Cliff - Battling Banjo's for Jesus feat. The St. Winnifred's School Choir.
EagleSE24
04-11-2005, 01:55 PM
Originally posted by DDD
The top ten posters to FMCDA at 3pm today all recieve all expenses paid trips to the Caribbean to promote the BBS.
A whip round of all other BBS members will fund the trip
And of course, as ambassadors, we'll be noted in society for our exquisite taste.
mik59
04-11-2005, 01:55 PM
43.7% of all statistics are made up right on the spot
Jalfrezi_Enema
04-11-2005, 01:57 PM
Originally posted by Oddjob
I work in local government in Brentwood
Don't be stupid, nobody works in local government anywhere! And Brentwood is Dave's wood according to Dave, there's a dsipute and by the time that's resolved those trees'll all be fossil fuel.
Del Gland
04-11-2005, 01:58 PM
Originally posted by DDD
The top ten posters to FMCDA at 3pm today all recieve all expenses paid trips to the Caribbean to promote the BBS.
BBS actually means Boy's Botty Sex...enjoy your trip!:p
brighton_eagle
04-11-2005, 01:58 PM
Originally posted by ponypunter
awful post
thanks. :love:
mik59
04-11-2005, 01:58 PM
A "2 by 4" actually measures 1.5" by 3.5"
Oh, I'm sorry, either my tape measure is a joke or that fact is actually true
Micky Droy
04-11-2005, 01:59 PM
PP, did you know that Natasha Kaplinsky has a clockwork key in the back of her head?
And that tortoises know Latin?
It's true.
And that Noel Edmonds, like Worzel Gummidge, gets up in the morning and chooses from one of several heads?
Originally posted by EagleSE24
And of course, as ambassadors, we'll be noted in society for our exquisite taste.
Not just exquisite taste but also sexual prowess and animal magnetism as it has now been clinically proven that 95% of women are unable to resist anyone with an FMCDA tattoo
Del Gland
04-11-2005, 02:00 PM
Pythagorous made Pi up for a laugh. Other numbers he invented were twenty eleven and eleventy eight!
ponypunter
04-11-2005, 02:04 PM
Originally posted by Micky Droy
PP, did you know that Natasha Kaplinsky has a clockwork key in the back of her head?
And that tortoises know Latin?
It's true.
And that Noel Edmonds, like Worzel Gummidge, gets up in the morning and chooses from one of several heads?
http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/waffen/violent-smiley-095.gif
Originally posted by Del Gland
BBS actually means Boy's Botty Sex...enjoy your trip!:p
The BBS funded trip for the FMCDA thread to St Lucia will still go ahead despite the jealousy of other members
Smurph
04-11-2005, 02:07 PM
1f86
The company Kenwood has gone into liquidation.
mik59
04-11-2005, 02:08 PM
FMCDA is 70% water and 33% toffee and 12% something that has so far baffled scientists
mik59
04-11-2005, 02:08 PM
Originally posted by Smurph
The company Kenwood has gone into liquidation. :lux:
Originally posted by Smurph
The company Kenwood has gone into liquidation.
:D :D
Micky Droy
04-11-2005, 02:11 PM
Originally posted by ponypunter
http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/waffen/violent-smiley-095.gif
Now THAT'S funny! :o
PalaceMonkey
04-11-2005, 02:12 PM
Originally posted by Micky Droy
PP, did you know that Natasha Kaplinsky has a clockwork key in the back of her head?
And that tortoises know Latin?
It's true.
And that Noel Edmonds, like Worzel Gummidge, gets up in the morning and chooses from one of several heads? #
She doesn't get it MD, there's no point wasting your gems on her. :(
Save 'em for HofD.
Obviously a marvellous woman.
ponypunter
04-11-2005, 02:12 PM
Originally posted by PalaceMonkey
#
Save 'em for HofD.
Obviously a marvellous woman.
Oh dear. You just cussed MD's lady.
Jalfrezi_Enema
04-11-2005, 02:13 PM
Vincent van Gogh was hugely fat and died unhappily under an apple tree surrounded by rolled up balls of paper.
Del Gland
04-11-2005, 02:13 PM
Originally posted by Smurph
The company Kenwood has gone into liquidation.
Also, Professor Fudge's Anal Fun Emporium has gone into receivership!
Micky Droy
04-11-2005, 02:15 PM
Originally posted by ponypunter
Oh dear. You just cussed MD's lady.
It's okay, she's mostly fictional. :(
Oasis named themsleves after the poular fruit drink after Liam said that Snapple was a sh*t name for a group.
Oddjob
04-11-2005, 02:16 PM
I'm off to take my daughter to feed the ducks (true)
Maybe see some of you tomorrow, might venture to the cherries pre-game, you never know
How will I recognise you all though ?
In a stunning departure from the usual format the BBC has announced that the next series of Last of the Summer Wine will be funny
Originally posted by Oddjob
I'm off to take my daughter to feed the ducks (true)
Maybe see some of you tomorrow, might venture to the cherries pre-game, you never know
How will I recognise you all though ?
I'll be in the Selhurst Arms with any luck so you probably wont
Phil's Barber
04-11-2005, 02:19 PM
They will all be in St Lucia.
FMCDA will be recieving some St. Lucian exchange students from Monday. To make them feel at home the remaining FCMDA ers will be drinking Lilt and being totally tropical.
DANCOO
04-11-2005, 02:20 PM
Originally posted by Oddjob
I'm off to take my daughter to feed the ducks (true)
Maybe see some of you tomorrow, might venture to the cherries pre-game, you never know
How will I recognise you all though ?
Just take a look around outside the pub. We'll be the first gang of bikers you see. Just come up and slap our arses, we'll know who you are.
mik59
04-11-2005, 02:20 PM
Originally posted by Oddjob
I'm off to take my daughter to feed the ducks (true)
Maybe see some of you tomorrow, might venture to the cherries pre-game, you never know
How will I recognise you all though ? I'll be the really tall one. PM will be the one with spiky hair and facial fuzz. We'll point out everyone else when you get there.
PalaceMonkey
04-11-2005, 02:21 PM
Originally posted by mik59
I'll be the really tall one. PM will be the one with spiky hair and facial fuzz. We'll point out everyone else when you get there.
Ponypunter will be the grumpy one, who doesn't get anyone's jokes :D
Del Gland
04-11-2005, 02:23 PM
I'll be the one punching anyone that looks remotely like Neil Warnock!
Karl Marx only turned to Communism after Groucho kicked him out of the band
Smurph
04-11-2005, 02:30 PM
There used to be a travel agent near me called Going Places but it's not there any more.
Smurph
04-11-2005, 02:32 PM
Boots the Chemist was so called to differentiate it from Boots the Cat.
A travel agent called Going Places has appeared in our street
Smurph
04-11-2005, 02:35 PM
Pizza Express was originally a goods train that ran from Naples to Rome.
EagleSE24
04-11-2005, 02:37 PM
Burger King is ironically 2341st in line to the throne.
1f54
Micky Droy
04-11-2005, 02:40 PM
My north ate my west and east and now I can only go straight forwards. :(
Jalfrezi_Enema
04-11-2005, 02:41 PM
All science fiction is fact.
EagleSE24
04-11-2005, 02:41 PM
Just had a thought. The moderators have probably stopped monitoring this thread. We can get away with anything!
Who wants to buy some crap that I've got sitting around on my desk?
Trilby
04-11-2005, 02:42 PM
Originally posted by Smurph
Boots the Chemist was so called to differentiate it from Boots the Cat. Did you know Boots orginally actually sold footwear until the propriator left some ointment out one day and a shopper tried to buy it?
Jalfrezi_Enema
04-11-2005, 02:42 PM
For example:
Here be Dragons.
Jalfrezi_Enema
04-11-2005, 02:44 PM
Originally posted by EagleSE24
Who wants to buy some crap that I've got sitting around on my desk?
Is it fresh?
Originally posted by Jalfrezi_Enema
All science fiction is fact.
If all science fiction is fact then is all science fact fiction ?
Phil's Barber
04-11-2005, 02:45 PM
Bosses at the BBC have decided to keep showing Later with Jules Holland but say it should be on earlier and have a new presenter.
Smurph
04-11-2005, 02:46 PM
Collared Doves are the criminals of the bird world.
Jalfrezi_Enema
04-11-2005, 02:47 PM
Originally posted by DDD
If all science fiction is fact then is all science fact fiction ?
Mais oui. Take the Atomic table for instance, not an atom on it.
Steven Hawkings American accent is put on to get girls
Jalfrezi_Enema
04-11-2005, 02:50 PM
Originally posted by DDD
Steven Hawkings American accent is put on to get girls
Many American ladies end up on dates with Speak n Spell machines by mistake.
Bob the Builder is currently being investigated by Trading Standards for his shoddy workmanship
Smurph
04-11-2005, 02:55 PM
Paramedics are so called these days because they attach themselves to the back of speeding ambulances, pull their ripcords and parasail to emergency call-outs. Those crazy guys save lives and have fun at the same time.
EagleSE24
04-11-2005, 02:56 PM
Originally posted by Jalfrezi_Enema
Is it fresh?
No.
But forget that for now. We could plan a coup d'etat and run the BBS by the rules that FMCDA decrees.
mik59
04-11-2005, 02:58 PM
Mik in Thai translates as "man who loves chickens".
mik59
04-11-2005, 03:01 PM
RickyB always falls over on his left side when intoxicated
Jalfrezi_Enema
04-11-2005, 03:02 PM
Originally posted by EagleSE24
No.
But forget that for now. We could plan a coup d'etat and run the BBS by the rules that FMCDA decrees.
Ha! I see what you mean, bringing order to a chaotic world. I'm with you Brutha, come the revolution, my friend, we shall all have our ice-cream.
PalaceMonkey
04-11-2005, 03:12 PM
Rule 1 : All FMCDA'ers must be laminated, in order to preserve the length of their NEW WORLD ORDER
Rule 2 : All FMCDA'ers must be willing to defend the honour of the thread and fellow FMCDA'ers with their lives if necessary
EagleSE24
04-11-2005, 03:16 PM
Rule 3: FMCDA'ers can make up rules on the spot if it looks like they may be in a bit of trouble. These must be obeyed by the masses.
Rule 4 ; All FMCDA'ers words on other threads are final
Smurph
04-11-2005, 03:23 PM
Coming soon to Men and Motors: Can Celebrity Fat Men Draw Apples?
Six Celebrities will attempt the fat man apple drawing challenge. The format is still to be finalised but the current plan is that three fat men who can't draw apples will be put on a strict diet and exercise programme for six months whilst six stick-thin food-dodging apple sketchers will binge for a similar time to settle the argument once and for all. Jeremy Clarkson will host and the winners will be judged by by Brian Sewell, Jean Alexander and Bez.
Jalfrezi_Enema
04-11-2005, 03:25 PM
Rule 10 (The one before 9): Press Ganging.
Any FMCDA member can capture and laminate any other person (BBS member or no) if they look stupid enough to enjoy our thread.
Phil's Barber
04-11-2005, 03:27 PM
Rule J: The rules should not be numbered but lettered.
EagleSE24
04-11-2005, 03:28 PM
Any volunteers to laminate the rules?
1f6d
James Melody
04-11-2005, 03:30 PM
Rule K : All rules are invalid unless tatooed on the left buttock of the offending member
Smurph
04-11-2005, 03:31 PM
Rule K: The rules may be laminated but must remain unwritten. This will save on printing costs thus allowing more money for laminating and perhaps even embossing.
EagleSE24
04-11-2005, 03:33 PM
Ooooooo. Embossing! Classy.
Anyone within the Peoples Democratic Republic of FMCDA who espouse such borgiouse (sp) aristocratic tendencies such as embossing will be shot by the FMCDA militia
The FMCDA is only thread on the BBS to have its own currency
KevTheOptimist
04-11-2005, 03:51 PM
If you stare at an apple for 10 minutes and 27 seconds it will appear to be a chocolate bar
Oddjob
04-11-2005, 04:32 PM
I'm back as was
People were starting to get annoyed
shame.
Oddjob
04-11-2005, 07:09 PM
Originally posted by James Melody
Jalfrezi_Enema 473
Oddjob 300
PalaceMonkey 230
James Melody 218
DANCOO 156
RickyB 116
Micky Droy 114
Swiftly moving up the rankings is Ponypunter!
Melodys postcount should be halved in this thread, this rapid rise up the table is unacceptable
Oddjob
04-11-2005, 07:19 PM
The home secretary (buggered if I know who it is) is considering upgrading the crime of stealing wrongly delivered DVDs to the death penalty.
james powell
04-11-2005, 07:23 PM
im 100% queer
Oddjob
04-11-2005, 07:25 PM
JM's already done that one.
Spoons
04-11-2005, 07:37 PM
The island Vanuatu does not really exist. It was created by the publishers of the Times World Atlas and put in their maps to detect people copying them illegally.
To keep it secret, people who book trips to Vanuatu are unbeknowingly flown to Majorca where they stay in a Vanuatu themed resort.
DANCOO
04-11-2005, 07:46 PM
The long forgotten German tradition of 'word reversing' ended abruptly in 1158. The tradition was used as a way of naming a fortification based on a brief desciption of it's area, where the position of the two words would be swapped over. The last ever fortification to be named in this way was a castle which was later to become a prison. The description of this castle's area was 'It's Cold'.
Oddjob
05-11-2005, 08:08 PM
Manufacturers in Hong Kong are close to making the breakthrough that will revolutionise how we travel forever.
Its called the ' Headicopter' and basically for several thousand pounds you have major surgery with the result being you have a scaled down version of a helicopters propeller inserted into your head, with 2 clicks of the finger it will whirr away and you are able to fly to your chosen destination, as long as the winds are ok of course
It will cost a lot, but the long term savings on public transport will be immense, however you are required to paint a big yellow H on your drive to allow you to land.
DANCOO
05-11-2005, 11:11 PM
In a desperate bid by the Government to raise vital funds, there will be a 'sex tax' introduced in 2006. It will be calculated according to age and attractiveness of partner......anyone willing to have a go on Sonya Jackson will be entitled to a full tax rebate.
mik59
05-11-2005, 11:57 PM
WARNING - TRUE: be prepared for attempts from Monday to transfer this thread to Chit Chat Gold.
If it happens, I blame JM.
Oddjob
06-11-2005, 10:06 AM
Originally posted by DANCOO
In a desperate bid by the Government to raise vital funds, there will be a 'sex tax' introduced in 2006. It will be calculated according to age and attractiveness of partner......anyone willing to have a go on Sonya Jackson will be entitled to a full tax rebate.
Anyone willing to have a threesome with Sonya and James Melody, will never have to pay tax again.
mik59
06-11-2005, 11:17 AM
In homage to his hero Pope Leo VIII, James Melody once attempted to die while having sex. There's some believe that he actually succeeded and the poster on FMCDA claiming to be him is actually Aled Jones making a vain bid for popular appeal.
Micky Droy
06-11-2005, 11:20 AM
John Motson makes the best paella outside of Spain.
mik59
06-11-2005, 11:21 AM
Fat men are approximately 93.48% apple pulp
mik59
06-11-2005, 11:23 AM
Tierra del Fuego has more English speakers than England
mik59
06-11-2005, 11:25 AM
When FMCDA reaches 115 pages the thread will emit an ultra sonic whistle that can only be heard by German shepherds
mik59
06-11-2005, 11:28 AM
Assuming that all the offspring survived, 190,000,000,000,000,000,000 little James Melodies could be produced in four months by the offspring of Sonya and he.
mik59
06-11-2005, 11:34 AM
1f69
Extra Virgin Olive Oil contains 11 virgins while your bog standard Olive Oil contains 5
mik59
06-11-2005, 11:38 AM
Although spectacularly hirsuite of late, Palace Monkey has the exactly the same amount of hair on his head as a bald man
mik59
06-11-2005, 11:46 AM
Danny Butterfield wrote James Melody while recuperating from injury
mik59
06-11-2005, 11:49 AM
Wet leaves kill more people each year than die in plane crashes
mik59
06-11-2005, 12:25 PM
In 1973 in New England, Barry Manilow received a 30 year jail sentence, 10 years for each of the following crimes: drinking Pina Coladas in the rain, practicising yoga and making love at midnight in the dunes of the cape. He escaped.
mik59
06-11-2005, 12:31 PM
Just today, the Governor of Texas has finally pardoned Oddjob, a pet tortoise, which was sentenced to death for murder in 1981. However, because no prison authority in any state was prepared to risk the tortoise's wrath by carrying out the execution, Oddjob was instead chained to a traffic light in downtown Houston. After an in depth enquiry, the original deaths, of six people, have been pinned on an armadillo thought to have entered the country illegally. The armadillo has since returned to Patagonia which has no extradition treaty with the USA. Justice is a long road my friends.
mik59
06-11-2005, 12:36 PM
The Jolly Green Giant has finally got p'd off with growing sweetcorn. He never could stand the sight of the stuff. He's decided to farm beavers instead.
mik59
06-11-2005, 12:43 PM
I haven't thought about sex since 10.43 this morning. Well, not about sex with anotehr human anyway.
mik59
06-11-2005, 12:44 PM
This thread will NEVER reach page 115
Kevin T
06-11-2005, 03:31 PM
There's no way in the world that a mod should ever move this thread to chit chat gold
RickyB
06-11-2005, 03:35 PM
:lux: :lux:
RickyB
06-11-2005, 03:41 PM
:( :( :( :(
mik59
06-11-2005, 03:45 PM
Mik59's predictions always come true although sometimes he cheats by actively intervening to make things happen and not just trusting it to fate, such as when he predicted that Burkina Faso would beat Brazil 3-1 in the 1957 World Cup.
RickyB
06-11-2005, 03:51 PM
In the future, mods who consign this thread to life in CCG will be subjected to torture by big men with big sticks. :(
mik59
06-11-2005, 03:54 PM
RickyB is the biggest man on the BBS and has a stick so big that he has a semi-detached house to store it in
Sunny Fan
06-11-2005, 03:56 PM
In the future, mods who return this thread to GCC will be rewarded with a life-time of free beer and bar snacks
RickyB
06-11-2005, 03:56 PM
Yay! :lux: Nice on Sunny! :)
mik59
06-11-2005, 04:02 PM
In exactly 1 month 2 weeks and a day, FMCDA will have so permeated every thread on the BBS that 1 in every 10 users will spontaneously combust upon registering and RickyB's cunning 2 stage plan will be at stage 3.
mik59
06-11-2005, 04:10 PM
TRUE: as I'm in the process of reviewing this thread from its humble beginnings, I declare u8mygoat to be a comedy genius.
RickyB
06-11-2005, 04:18 PM
A bird in the hand is not worth two in the bush. Aussie birds are fit innit!
mrgins
06-11-2005, 04:19 PM
a hand in the bird is equal to two hands in a bush
mik59
06-11-2005, 04:31 PM
McVities have finally cracked the problem of the 1st biscuit always being broken - they're going to leave it out. It's always the simple ideas isn't it?
From next week I'm going to be applying the same principle to the first day back @ work after a break always being sh**
mik59
06-11-2005, 04:44 PM
Funny man Tommy Cooper was told repeatedly not to quit his day job but since he worked nights he carried on regardless
Mute people can't burp
A new EU directive will come into force in 2006 - square meals can not be eaten off round plates. (Stands to reason really.)
Bush's anti-terror laws have been suspended after one of his daughters was arrested at Washington airport yesterday for shouting out "hi" to her mate Jack.
mik59
06-11-2005, 05:00 PM
Marmalade comes from bees that are fed a strict oranges only diet.
It's a well known fact that people from Poland are called Poles but a little known fact that people from Holland are called Holes.
mik59
06-11-2005, 05:21 PM
Originally posted by mik59
TRUE: as I'm in the process of reviewing this thread from its humble beginnings, I declare u8mygoat to be a comedy genius. Not to diss current posters on this thread who are also responsible for my having to wear nappies, I'm up to 24/1/05 and DANCOO is running a very close 2nd.
mik59
06-11-2005, 05:56 PM
1f72
Fire works? Rubbish! Fire is actually extremely lazy and in Britain is responsible for 14% of the invalidity benefit paid out every year. Blunkett knew this and was sacked before he could reveal it in an answer to a Parliamentary Question.
Oddjob
06-11-2005, 06:27 PM
Originally posted by mik59
Not to diss current posters on this thread who are also responsible for my having to wear nappies, I'm up to 24/1/05 and DANCOO is running a very close 2nd.
You have a long way to go my friend
mik59
06-11-2005, 07:05 PM
Originally posted by Oddjob
You have a long way to go my friend Every step is a pleasure - is kinda like a pilgrimage
stevek
06-11-2005, 07:08 PM
Mik59 is only 4 foot 6 tall, but by clever use of mirrors appears to be taller than Peter Crouch.
DANCOO
06-11-2005, 07:12 PM
Originally posted by Oddjob
You have a long way to go my friend
I would like to say now, that if I fall down the pecking order it is due to my self-imposed semi-sabatical from this thread, due to what I call the 'Mad Years' - from around 12/10 ( Page 70 ) to around 04/11 ( Page 113 ).
mik59
06-11-2005, 07:14 PM
Originally posted by stevek
Mik59 is only 4 foot 6 tall, but by clever use of mirrors appears to be taller than Peter Crouch. :eek:
No matter how hard the posters try, FMCDA will not appear on 'Latest from the Forums' due to a secret attempt by mods to turn the BBS into a site about football only ... and garlic bread.
mik59
06-11-2005, 07:15 PM
Originally posted by DANCOO
I would like to say now, that if I fall down the pecking order it is due to my self-imposed semi-sabatical from this thread, due to what I call the 'Mad Years' - from around 12/10 ( Page 70 ) to around 04/11 ( Page 113 ). Your pecker is preserved in my compendium sir
Spoons
06-11-2005, 07:39 PM
If you rub the screen with an old sixpence, my avater will appear.
mik59
06-11-2005, 07:46 PM
Originally posted by Spoons
If you rub the screen with an old sixpence, my avater will appear. This is true! Oh, hang on, it's a big scratch. Curses!
mik59
06-11-2005, 08:19 PM
There are real people in my TV. I just can't figure out how they change the rooms around so quick.
Oddjob
06-11-2005, 08:21 PM
mik59's rapid rise up the FMCDA table is taking on melody-esque proportions.
mik59
06-11-2005, 08:24 PM
mik59 has gone from being a groupie to a FMCDA wannabe and should be rewarded with free bourbon which he's allergic too.
Everybody is really talking about Kelly Clarkson's new album. I've just checked. Now can anybody contribute to my 'phone bill?
mik59
06-11-2005, 08:43 PM
Katie Melua is the illegitimate child of Terry Wogan from a liaison he had while working in the former Soviet Union as a secret agent on behalf the Isle of Man council which is odd because he's actually from Tasmania and is himself the product a liaison between ... but that's another story.
mik59
06-11-2005, 09:21 PM
Avril Lavigne is 47 years old, just 1 year older than mik59 who, unlike our Avril, still has some of his own hair.
James Melody
06-11-2005, 09:43 PM
mik59 cannot afford a holiday in 2006. As a result he is going hell for leather to book a place in the Top10 FMCDA international jolly 2006
follow cpfc
06-11-2005, 09:46 PM
I think cheese tastes good
mik59
06-11-2005, 09:54 PM
Originally posted by James Melody
mik59 cannot afford a holiday in 2006. As a result he is going hell for leather to book a place in the Top10 FMCDA international jolly 2006 :cool: stoolpigeon ;)
mik59
06-11-2005, 10:15 PM
James Melody's desperation to partake in the FMCDA international jolly 2006 is just a cover for his obssesive pursuit of the one Vera Lynne fart he does not have in his collection - he believes them to have magical properties and keeps them in jars in his cellar. The fart in question escaped during Vera's infamous Get Your T*ts Out For Our Brave Lads Tour in 1957 and time is running out for uber fan JM.
stevek
07-11-2005, 07:33 AM
Ever seen Mik59 and James Melody together?
Thought not - that's because Melody's secret identity is Mik59.
James Melody
07-11-2005, 07:41 AM
Ken Livingstone's obsession with killing off the routemaster bus is down to a childhood incident.
As a young boy he was knocked off his bike by the number 41 while travelling to his local communist party office on a sunday morning. From that day he vowed to have his revenge
James Melody
07-11-2005, 07:44 AM
74% of BBS posters are unaware of the existence of Crystal Palace F.C.
They hang out for the apples
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 07:44 AM
Every single London tramp is actually a method actor preparing for a new role in a gritty drama about the perils of late capitalist urban life.
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 07:55 AM
Originally posted by Oddjob
Melodys postcount should be halved in this thread, this rapid rise up the table is unacceptable
Shoot 'im.
1fa8
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 07:56 AM
James Melody has been shot. 4 suspects have been arrested: Me, Maz, Oddjob and Maggie Simpson.
Place yer bets.
Oddjob
07-11-2005, 08:49 AM
Originally posted by Jalfrezi_Enema
James Melody has been shot. 4 suspects have been arrested: Me, Maz, Oddjob and Maggie Simpson.
Place yer bets.
To be fair, its not my usual M.O
DANCOO
07-11-2005, 08:58 AM
Palace Monkey has been banned from this thread, he's been a very naughty boy.
PalaceMonkey
07-11-2005, 09:07 AM
:(
EagleSE24
07-11-2005, 09:14 AM
For every text message you send, a fairy dies.
mik59
07-11-2005, 09:32 AM
Originally posted by EagleSE24
For every text message you send, a fairy dies. Instant classic :lux:
Palace Monkey is not a naughty boy, he's just a messiah
London is a collection of small villages
Brighton is a city
I'm on a road to nowhere
It's a fact. In fact it is the only fact. All other facts are lies.
Al From Bromley
07-11-2005, 09:38 AM
Sour cream comes from bitter and twisted cows.
mik59
07-11-2005, 10:04 AM
Everybody has a hungry heart. This discovery, outlined in the latest New Scientist, is set to revolutionise the slimming industry.
PalaceMonkey
07-11-2005, 10:09 AM
Originally posted by Al From Bromley
Sour cream comes from bitter and twisted cows.
Whereas Dairylea Triangles are produced by milking cows using a set square
stevek
07-11-2005, 10:11 AM
Originally posted by PalaceMonkey
Whereas Dairylea Triangles are produced by milking cows using a set square
If you ever wondered how
You get triangles from a cow
You need butter, milk and cheese
And an equilateral chainsaw.
:)
Originally posted by PalaceMonkey
Whereas Dairylea Triangles are produced by milking cows using a set square
How do they make cheese strings ?
Maidstoned Eagle
07-11-2005, 10:19 AM
Man discovers first pink pubic hair.... then he pisses out of it.
stevek
07-11-2005, 10:24 AM
Evolutionary scientists now believe the reason we have pubic hair is to keep teeth clean - a kind of primeval flossing.
Basil Brush is ex Palace and West Ham defender Paul Brush's youngest son.
EagleSE24
07-11-2005, 11:21 AM
After extensive research, David Beckham has traced his family tree back 300 years. He will be naming his next child after his great, great, great, great, great grandfather. Gilette Brylcreem Predator Beckham.
Apparently 'It's all about staying true to your roots'.
PalaceMonkey
07-11-2005, 11:25 AM
Originally posted by DDD
How do they make cheese strings ?
by putting string into the cheese making vat.
duh :rolleyes:
Originally posted by PalaceMonkey
by putting string into the cheese making vat.
duh :rolleyes:
God the things they can do nowadays with cheese and string :D
So simple its genius
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 12:19 PM
Originally posted by mik59
TRUE: as I'm in the process of reviewing this thread from its humble beginnings, I declare u8mygoat to be a comedy genius.
Hear hear.
Don't know where he's gone though. Was a student, I think.
Oddjob
07-11-2005, 12:21 PM
Originally posted by Jalfrezi_Enema
Hear hear.
Don't know where he's gone though. Was a student, I think.
Was a student?
Have you shot him as well ?
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 12:24 PM
Originally posted by Oddjob
Was a student?
Have you shot him as well ?
Yep and you're next Bowler Boy!
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 12:25 PM
The Spaghetti western was invented before spaghetti.
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 12:26 PM
If you stare at the heart of Burberry's famous check pattern for 3 minutes without moving, you will lose 80% of your brain cells, be overcome by the need to buy more gold and if anybody ever mentions grammar to you, you'll be thinking: Gram a what?
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 12:28 PM
Jamie Oliver is made out of crushed beetles with a hint of garlic, baked in a tin shed in the hot sun for 10 months (just to be sure).
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 12:29 PM
he has been slammed by other top chefs for using too much Heinz Tomato Sauce in his recipes.
Oddjob
07-11-2005, 12:29 PM
Originally posted by Jalfrezi_Enema
Yep and you're next Bowler Boy!
:eek: :eek: :eek:
1f9e
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 12:31 PM
Originally posted by Mik59
TRUE: as I'm in the process of reviewing this thread from its humble beginnings, I declare u8mygoat to be a comedy genius.
There was one about Monkey's being able to fly up to a mile. Stayed with me forever that one.
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 12:32 PM
Originally posted by Oddjob
:eek: :eek: :eek:
------- BANG!
Oddjob
07-11-2005, 12:34 PM
In his capacity as the ' smart one ' of the FMCDA'ers, Micky Droy will be hosting a number of lectures around the country, with the chance for autographs and photos after, j_e will be carrying the bags.
First date is 24th March 2006 at Doncaster Pavillion.
DANCOO
07-11-2005, 12:35 PM
Originally posted by Jalfrezi_Enema
Hear hear.
Don't know where he's gone though. Was a student, I think.
He still posts occasionally, just longer in here.:(
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 12:38 PM
Originally posted by Oddjob
j_e will be carrying the bags.
Carry MD's bags! Ooooo, can, can I, can I?
By the way, I wasn't REALLY trying to shoot you, I just dropped the Yak Iwas carrying in a bath. Hope there are no misunderstandings.
Oddjob
07-11-2005, 12:39 PM
Originally posted by Jalfrezi_Enema
Carry MD's bags! Ooooo, can, can I, can I?
By the way, I wasn't REALLY trying to shoot you, I just dropped the Yak Iwas carrying in a bath. Hope there are no misunderstandings.
Dont worry, its happened to the best of us
James Melody
07-11-2005, 12:39 PM
If you take equal parts apple juice and pear juice and mix them it tastes like orange juice
Jalfrezi_Enema
07-11-2005, 12:41 PM
In a new memo to all staff and players at the club, Alex Ferguson has reminded everybody that the way they comport themselves must be professional at all times as it reflects on the club.
Saying B*ll*cks on National TV every chance you get is the way forward and will be included in the new Mission Statement.
PalaceMonkey
07-11-2005, 12:47 PM
"I'd like to know what happens, when you apply some pressure?" croon indie band Maximo Park.
And I can now reveal the answer!
It goes a bit white, then a bit red, then it hurts a bit and you have to lie down till nurse brings you a cup of sugary tea.
Bruce Forsyths toupee is made from the pubic hair of down at heel OAP's from Cornwall who sell it to pay their exorbitant council tax bills.
mik59
07-11-2005, 01:49 PM
236 launderettes in town centre locations, all 16.3 miles apart and all on longitude 0, i.e. directly in line with Greenwich, are built on the sites of neolithic burial grounds. Just a coincidence of course.
It is technically possible to hear it on the grapevine but only if the grapes are of the Nebbiolo variety, it's been raining and the wind is NNW.
EagleSE24
07-11-2005, 01:54 PM
The shipping areas of Dogger and Fisher have allied to declare war on Fitzroy. The PM has suspended Parliament in order to diffuse the situation but fears that it may already be too late. Stay tuned for further updates.
PalaceMonkey
07-11-2005, 01:55 PM
EagleSE24 is deaf, but looks good.
EagleSE24
07-11-2005, 02:18 PM
Due to their reliance on each other, Tony Blair and G.W Bush have a really long piece of string with cans attached to either end stretching from Downing St to the White House so that they can talk to each other any time day or night.
Lesbians are named after 19th century Irish scientist Les Beehan who discovered them
mik59
07-11-2005, 03:01 PM
Originally posted by EagleSE24
The shipping areas of Dogger and Fisher have allied to declare war on Fitzroy. The PM has suspended Parliament in order to diffuse the situation but fears that it may already be too late. Stay tuned for further updates. Any more? I'm getting quite nervous, not least 'cos one of my favourite aunts is a fishing trawler skipper in those waters. At least that what she told my Dad. She's 104 you know.
EagleSE24
07-11-2005, 03:09 PM
Not much more. The strong South South Easterly wind is making all communication extremely difficult. However the diplomatic service are rumoured to have picked up the following statement. 'Piss off, ya bollox'
mik59
07-11-2005, 03:18 PM
Originally posted by EagleSE24
Not much more. The strong South South Easterly wind is making all communication extremely difficult. However the diplomatic service are rumoured to have picked up the following statement. 'Piss off, ya bollox' Interesting and cunning - think they're using the out of date call sign from the Ausch NEC code book (1947 edition). My copy never survived the cod war so it's useless - anyone got a copy?
PalaceMonkey
07-11-2005, 03:22 PM
I've got a version from the Bod War.
Farmer Barlemow is attacking from the Falkands.
Least think that what it means.
mik59
07-11-2005, 03:57 PM
This is worse than I thought. Just PMd the PM and had a word on the PQ. Its OT. Cabbage crates are over the briney and ... crzzz ... pschhtttt .... Palace .... ffzzzzzz ..... spill my pint ......
mik59
07-11-2005, 05:25 PM
1f65
Exploded myths no. 164: it wasn't an apple that William Tell shot from his son's head but the often ignored Kumquat.
nottsunieagle
07-11-2005, 07:24 PM
Allow me to enter the fray...
The Mariana Trench, the deepest part of the ocean was not in fact created by the forces of plate tectonics, but was instead the result of stray French cannon fire, that hit the city of Atlantis, causing it to sink into the depths below and create the crater we have today.
mik59
07-11-2005, 07:54 PM
Originally posted by nottsunieagle
Allow me to enter the fray... You're welcome ... and to a re-entry anytime!
Mountains are pushed out of the earth by rude iguanas or fused from fish sandwiches
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 07:55 PM
Originally posted by Oddjob
In his capacity as the ' smart one ' of the FMCDA'ers, Micky Droy will be hosting a number of lectures around the country, with the chance for autographs and photos after, j_e will be carrying the bags.
First date is 24th March 2006 at Doncaster Pavillion.
The first lecture will be on "The Day They Landed - Things You Didn't Know About 'Them' But You Will Now After This If You Listen".
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 07:56 PM
Keith Harris is doing the introduction.
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 07:56 PM
But I've asked that he wears a mask of Orville's face, and vice versa.
He wants an extra tenner for it :veryangry
mik59
07-11-2005, 08:02 PM
One horsepower is the amount of energy it takes to drag a horse 500 feet in one second.
Clouds are high flying fogs.
nottsunieagle
07-11-2005, 08:05 PM
Happy hour used to originally signify closing time, as the beer in the middle ages was considered foul-tasting and people were glad to get away from it. The term now has happy connotations due to the Brewery's invention of 'Geordies' in the 18th century, who gleefully devoured any alcoholic beverage in sight.
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 08:07 PM
Mice have spare mouse heads lined up in their mouse hole homes.
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 08:07 PM
If you flick a bogey and it hits a mouse, the mouse will shoot you in the nose with a thin green laser beam.
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 08:08 PM
Mice have little bi-planes they use when we're asleep.
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 08:11 PM
Nelson Picquet used to race with an audiobook of Mein Kampf on a loop.
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 08:13 PM
Every time a baby dreams a marble is born.
mik59
07-11-2005, 08:15 PM
We fear for Micky Droy.
H2O is hot water and CO2 is cold water.
Just as deforestration is shrinking the Amazon rain forests so it is having the same effects on the Amazonian Indians who some 1000 years ago were on average 9' 4" tall.
A major discovery was made today by Mary Leaky, who found a circle of rocks that broke wind.
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 08:15 PM
The sky is blue because the other colours were taken.
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 08:19 PM
If you reduce any proposition to its logical distillation in logic and language you always get the same answer: "Mama Goat".
This realisation made Wittgenstein give up the piano, made Neitzche bugger himself with icicles, and made Socrates invent Quoits.
mik59
07-11-2005, 08:22 PM
Originally posted by Micky Droy
The sky is blue because the other colours were taken. :sob:
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 08:22 PM
Every sheep is a lost alcoholic. Whenever we approach them they call out to us, asking where the nearest drinking establishment is.
Oddjob
07-11-2005, 08:39 PM
Theres a greater chance of you getting all 6 numbers on this weeks lottery, than you phoning 6 different chinese takeaways and ordering the same number off the menu from each, and it being the exact same dish every time.
mik59
07-11-2005, 08:49 PM
Shakespeare could not have written all those plays as he would have been far too busy inventing the first automated launderette.
RickyB
07-11-2005, 09:07 PM
:veryangry :veryangry :veryangry
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 09:09 PM
WHO IS DOING THIS TO US?
You know what this means team... direct action once again...
One of us predicted this the other day - can't remember who - maybe they could share their info - it helps to visualise the enemy.
nottsunieagle
07-11-2005, 09:11 PM
As a newbie to the FMCDA craze, i'll happily form part of Operation Human Shield with regards to direct action! Constant bombardment and vigilance required!!!
No mistakes, no mercy!!!
mik59
07-11-2005, 09:12 PM
Um that was me but 'cos someone threatened to start a thread today proposing that this be done.
I propose we randomly post FMCDA in other threads
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 09:15 PM
2174
Why don't they like our little thread? It does no harm.
To be fair this thread ticks all the boxes for the criteria for CCG, after the first few pages it is just white noise.
I'm sure this thread can have a long a fruitful life in here.
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 09:21 PM
Originally posted by Dave
To be fair this thread ticks all the boxes for the criteria for CCG, after the first few pages it is just white noise.
I'm sure this thread can have a long a fruitful life in here.
White noise!
Your judgement has deserted you on this one Dave!
:sob:
... did Melody tip the balance...?
Oddjob
07-11-2005, 09:23 PM
Originally posted by Micky Droy
... did Melody tip the balance...?
I bloody knew it, we should have killed him when we had the chance
mik59
07-11-2005, 09:24 PM
Originally posted by Dave
To be fair this thread ticks all the boxes for the criteria for CCG, after the first few pages it is just white noise.
I'm sure this thread can have a long a fruitful life in here. What criteria be those then? (I looked over weekend in anticipation of this and couldn't find any.) In the opinion of workmates, some of who have joined BBS on the strength of it, it is quality humour, as good as you get on t'other CCG threads, if not better. Just all in one place for easier navigation.
... did Melody tip the balance...?
No comment but to be fair if you read the first few pages of the thread it is really clever then it just decends into . . . well the type of thing you see in here really.
I really that this is probably the best place for it, easier to find too. No?
mik59
07-11-2005, 09:28 PM
OK, I'll withdraw those ill considered ones on p102, will that do the trick? :(
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 09:32 PM
Originally posted by Dave
No comment but to be fair if you read the first few pages of the thread it is really clever then it just decends into . . . well the type of thing you see in here really.
I really that this is probably the best place for it, easier to find too. No?
Well, to be serious a moment, and only since you ended your post with a '?'.
I don't think so personally. I think most of the people who post on it read it with pleasure and see it as a place to be joky (sometimes even witty!) on GCC without clogging up other threads with tangential gags. I think it's so popular because there's a bunch of GCC folk who don't go in for the repetitive games of CCG, and who have the tendency to go off topic when they spot a chance for a gag or pun or whetever on a GCC thread. This thread gives them (us I should say - I;m guilty of the tendency) to have a little release valve within GCC and rein in our splurging instincts on other threads.
I suppose where the damn thing lives is - should be - a minor detail, but in terms of browsing habits I think it matters. On GCC you can dip into it, then scoot back into another thread.
Ah well, that's my tuppence. You moderate this place bloody well and with a cool light touch.
/seriousness off
Oddjob
07-11-2005, 09:35 PM
Originally posted by Micky Droy
Well, to be serious a moment, and only since you ended your post with a '?'.
I don't think so personally. I think most of the people who post on it read it with pleasure and see it as a place to be joky (sometimes even witty!) on GCC without clogging up other threads with tangential gags. I think it's so popular because there's a bunch of GCC folk who don't go in for the repetitive games of CCG, and who have the tendency to go off topic when they spot a chance for a gag or pun or whetever on a GCC thread. This thread gives them (us I should say - I;m guilty of the tendency) to have a little release valve within GCC and rein in our splurging instincts on other threads.
I suppose where the damn thing lives is - should be - a minor detail, but in terms of browsing habits I think it matters. On GCC you can dip into it, then scoot back into another thread.
Ah well, that's my tuppence. You moderate this place bloody well and with a cool light touch.
/seriousness off
That was almost Churchillian.
mik59
07-11-2005, 09:36 PM
This thread has gone off topic :o
Micky Droy
07-11-2005, 09:39 PM
Originally posted by Oddjob
That was almost Churchillian.
:D
You just made me laugh at myself for three minutes.
Oh Christ, I need to get off the internet.
mik59
07-11-2005, 09:53 PM
I feel this moment deserves a resurrection of some of my favourite all time classic FMCDA contributions:
Dogs pee three times their own body weight per day
There's enough iron in the human body to create a ladder that would stretch to the moon
The American term "Independance Day" was stolen from a Jamaican saying "In de pen dance", which originated from dancing in an animal pen to celebrate the birth of a new born child
Beer actually contains 0% alcohol. It turns out men just simply enjoy acting like idiots!
Monkeys can fly a distance of up to 1 mile provided they start from a position 1 mile above the earth's surface
Mr Ed the talking horse couldn't actually speak. It was another horse that did the talking
Before the smash hit film "Apollo 13" the first 12 Apollo films all flopped and many went straight to TV without ever being shown in cinemas
Terry Wogan smells of tweed
If you make instant coffee in a microwave oven, it'll be ready before you are
Water in its natural form is highly toxic
If you put your car key in your front door and turn it, your house will start up
Despite it's name Pneumonia has been around for donkey's years
Telepathy is the desire to destroy televisions
Wednesday is the illegitimate love child of Darren Day
In Columbia, cocaine is known as "english standing in the corner and looking moody powder"
4 is H with cramp
Gnomes are merely elves microwaved on full power until Wednesday
Jeremy Beadle is actually a dwarf, but unlike most dwarves, he has an oversized body, head, arms, legs and hand
Sex was invented in 1838
73% of garden sheds are female
During the heatwave of 1976, seventeen people in Basildon went missing through sinking into soft tar
The Millennium Bug was the direct descendent of an older species first found inhabiting an abacus in the year 999
And that's just from pages 1-25
2023
calne eagle
07-11-2005, 10:08 PM
Look, the fact is that you're here now.
Relax, get to know your fellow inmates, and visiting is on the first Sunday of the month.
(And avoid the showers on B block, and PO Watson is a ........)
James
07-11-2005, 10:11 PM
Originally posted by Micky Droy
White noise!
Your judgement has deserted you on this one Dave!
:sob:
... did Melody tip the balance...? I agree (sorry Dave). this is a genuinely funny thread - with a few duds along the way.
CCG is unadulterated bollocks and it's a shame that the FMCDA fans have to come into this somewhat scary place to dip into their favourite thread.
Still, if this is to be it's final resting place - good luck to it. I hope it finds some friends in here.
Neil the Eagle
07-11-2005, 11:00 PM
Originally posted by James
CCG is unadulterated bollocks
Apart from q p
Its intimately cliquey (just like the Social thread), but it ain't bollocks.
calne eagle
07-11-2005, 11:52 PM
Originally posted by James
Still, if this is to be it's final resting place - good luck to it. I hope it finds some friends in here.
No finer people - you smug git :D.
'Unadulterated bollocks?!?!'
(Narrow-minded fecking legal .......)
stevek
08-11-2005, 06:22 AM
Technically, it is still illegal in Chelmsford to urinate on the first Thursday in October
mik59
08-11-2005, 07:01 AM
Originally posted by James
CCG is unadulterated bollocks Then it should be retitled The Biggus Mickus Genitalia Forum
David Bowie thinks he is being stalked by someone who is dressed like a giant pink rabbit. Bowie has noticed the fan at several recent concerts, but he became alarmed when he got on a plane and the bunny was on board.
Ophra Winfrey is a distant cousin of Tony Blair.
Jim Carrey owns 16% of the state of Yucatan, Mexico, where his keeps his pet racing ferrets.
Palacebird83
08-11-2005, 07:04 AM
I think that if this has been moved in here for good then this should be a sticky!!!
BaldEagle96
08-11-2005, 07:32 AM
Originally posted by James
CCG is unadulterated bollocks
And this thread is any different????
mik59
08-11-2005, 07:45 AM
Billions of public money has been wasted by the Met after their top brass misheard a news items and were led into believing that the biggest threat from the internet today was cardboard...
mik59
08-11-2005, 08:03 AM
Originally posted by BaldEagle96
And this thread is any different???? If people posted their viuews on the FMCDA poll http://forums.cpfc.org/showthread.php?s=&threadid=117551 then this thread would remain unadulterated whatever you think of it.
I thanks you
BaldEagle96
08-11-2005, 08:10 AM
Originally posted by mik59
If people posted their viuews on the FMCDA poll http://forums.cpfc.org/showthread.php?s=&threadid=117551 then this thread would remain unadulterated whatever you think of it.
I thanks you
The point being though that it was because of threads such as this one that CCG was created in the first place...
Personally I could not care less where it is mind!
PalaceMonkey
08-11-2005, 08:16 AM
Originally posted by Micky Droy
... did Melody tip the balance...?
damn his bones :sob:
EagleSE24
08-11-2005, 08:22 AM
First Eldorado gets cancelled and now this :sob:
Jalfrezi_Enema
08-11-2005, 08:25 AM
Of a Tuesday morning, I like to bump into an arbitrary decision to exercise power just because you can. I like to be told that the one place on the web I can come to on a daily basis for some light relief to my local government life doesn't want that kind of thing going on around the adults. I like to be told that our thread is unadulterated B*ll*cks and have its quality judged by someone who has never contributed. I like the fact that as the viewing figures show, this thread is viewed by many more people than actually contribute to it and that this light relief for any and all who want it is available at the simple click of a button in its natural home where all the other gossip and chit-chat and camaraderie goes on. I like to be told that this is not appreciated by the BBS who obviously wouldnt want our sort round here interrupting their high-faluting talk.
I like to be told that the creative energy exhibited by us all (not withstanding the outcome of that energy in my case) is a waste of effort and not valued on this board. I like to be told that my output is shit and to have it equated with counting to a million in hexa-fvcking-decimal. In short, I like to be told by the community in which I have chosen to make my home that I am not welcome.
Altogether, it cheers me up no end.
EagleSE24
08-11-2005, 08:29 AM
I like all of the above as well.
EagleSE24
08-11-2005, 08:36 AM
As I'm sure you remember Mr Tumnus was on display at London Zoo last week. Although in a crate at the airport clearly marked 'Fragile' and 'Narnia' it appears he's escaped and a pal close to the star says 'he wants to make a life for himself in the UK and wants to be treated like any normal half-man, half-goat would be.'
DANCOO
08-11-2005, 08:56 AM
I think the point with FMCDA's, is that whether it be to everyone's tastes or not, the fact remains that it takes a degree of creativity ( for the most part ), when posting.
I fail to see how this can be compared to qp, QP, 1, 2, 3, 5, shark...etc.
Why I'm posting this here is a complete waste, as now it has been taken out of the mainstream I doubt many people will read it...I shall take this up elsewhere.
14d0
EagleSE24
08-11-2005, 09:01 AM
Internet message board talent scouts declared their interest in arranging the publication of FMCDA in time for Xmas with all contributors receiving a share (based on quality not quantity of course) of the royalties. But this interest has now been dropped as they can't find the f**king thread!
PalaceMonkey
08-11-2005, 09:05 AM
James Melody has killed several fairy tale creatures.
Bambi and Thumper were first, followed swiftly by the 3 Blind Mice.
He is currently garotting Donner & Blitzen in front of a group of orphans.
Overall, his presence on the Earth has increased unhappiness by a factor of 3.
Oddjob
08-11-2005, 09:16 AM
We dont belong here
I feel sick
Originally posted by Oddjob
We dont belong here
I feel sick
I know
Its like waking up in a strange hotel room in Aberdeen, naked excpet for one sock, chained to a goat wondering how you got there....and how the f**k you are going to get home...
PalaceMonkey
08-11-2005, 09:23 AM
:sob:
Melody has now just killed Julie Andrews, both as Mary Poppins and whoever she is in the Sound of Music.
Actually, that may not be as bad as it seems. I hate musicals.
(except South Park)
Originally posted by mik59
Um that was me but 'cos someone threatened to start a thread today proposing that this be done.
I propose we randomly post FMCDA in other threads
This is a good idea - a bit of BBS guerilla tactics !!
A thread titled 'So what do you think of the war in Iraq ?' would benefit hugely from the first post being...
'' No idea but did you know Terry Wogan smells of Tweed''
DANCOO
08-11-2005, 09:24 AM
c..c..c..can't s..s..t..t..t..top m..m..m..ys..s..self
m..m..mmmust r.r.r.e.e.esis..s..st..t..t
aarrrgghhhh
qp
qp
qp
qp
qp
qp
QP
SOMEONE HELP ME PLEASE :sob:
QP
QP
QP
1
2
3
4
5
shark
shark
hippo
shark
oxo
oxo
http://forum.rscnet.org/images/smilies/ashamed.gif :sob:
James Melody
08-11-2005, 09:24 AM
I have resigned my position with FMCDA - the post is now vacant
DANCOO
08-11-2005, 09:25 AM
Originally posted by James Melody
I have resigned my position with FMCDA - the post is now vacant
Yeah, you're job is done hey. :hmph:
Oddjob
08-11-2005, 09:30 AM
Originally posted by James Melody
I have resigned my position with FMCDA - the post is now vacant
I have already interviewed 2 planks of wood as suitable replacements.
EagleSE24
08-11-2005, 09:31 AM
What is the procedure for rights of appeal? I can't be arsed to read the rules of the BBS. Someone do it for me.
DANCOO
08-11-2005, 09:31 AM
Originally posted by Oddjob
I have already interviewed 2 planks of wood as suitable replacements.
I interviewed those two this morning Oddjob...over-qualified in my opinion.
PalaceMonkey
08-11-2005, 09:33 AM
Never go with balsa wood.
CANNOT be trusted
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