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  #201  
Old 30-12-2016, 03:01 AM
KYLIE MINEAGLE KYLIE MINEAGLE is online now
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KYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is here
Two little boys arguing about their respective dads .

Johnny " My dad earns 500k a year"

Billy "My dad earns 750k a year"

Johhny " My dad takes us to Ibiza every year and stays in a villa with a maid and everything"

Billy "Yeah my dad does the same in Barbados"

Johhny " My dad drives a porcsche"

Billy " My dad drives a Maserrati "

Johhny " My dad's got two willies"

Billy " What? How does that work'

Johhny " Well he's got one he pisses out of , and one he cleans the au pairs teeth with"
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  #202  
Old 30-12-2016, 03:01 AM
KYLIE MINEAGLE KYLIE MINEAGLE is online now
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KYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is hereKYLIE MINEAGLE Sam the man is here
Two little boys arguing about their respective dads .

Johnny " My dad earns 500k a year"

Billy "My dad earns 750k a year"

Johhny " My dad takes us to Ibiza every year and stays in a villa with a maid and everything"

Billy "Yeah my dad does the same in Barbados"

Johhny " My dad drives a porcsche"

Billy " My dad drives a Maserrati "

Johhny " My dad's got two willies"

Billy " What? How does that work'

Johhny " Well he's got one he pisses out of , and one he cleans the au pairs teeth with"
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  #203  
Old 30-12-2016, 03:31 AM
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It was funnier the first time
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  #204  
Old 30-12-2016, 03:56 AM
KYLIE MINEAGLE KYLIE MINEAGLE is online now
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It was funnier the first time
Should have stopped me if you had heard it
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  #205  
Old 03-01-2017, 02:14 PM
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BB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
There are 10 types of people in the world. Those that understand the binary system and those that don't.
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  #206  
Old 03-01-2017, 02:15 PM
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BB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
There are two types of people in this world. Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
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  #207  
Old 05-01-2017, 03:46 PM
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BB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
How many Freudians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
It takes two, one to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the peni-, fathe-, ladder
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  #208  
Old 05-01-2017, 03:46 PM
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BB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
Rene Descartes walks into a bar.
“Beer?” asks the barman.
“I think not” replies Rene, who promptly disappears.
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  #209  
Old 05-01-2017, 03:53 PM
BERT'S HEAD BERT'S HEAD is offline
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Cheers Bob. Won't be telling any of them them any time soon as I don't get em
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  #210  
Old 05-01-2017, 03:57 PM
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ExiledStirling ExiledStirling is online now
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I get the second one but not the first .

'I think therefore I am' explains the second one Bert's Head.
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  #211  
Old 05-01-2017, 04:03 PM
BERT'S HEAD BERT'S HEAD is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ExiledStirling View Post
I get the second one but not the first .

'I think therefore I am' explains the second one Bert's Head.
I know. And I still don't.
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  #212  
Old 05-01-2017, 04:03 PM
Dan Dare Dan Dare is online now
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Dan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
Freud was obsessed with sex and parents, so that explains the first one.
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  #213  
Old 05-01-2017, 04:04 PM
BERT'S HEAD BERT'S HEAD is offline
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Why doesn't he think that he will have a beer ?
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  #214  
Old 05-01-2017, 04:16 PM
Dan Dare Dan Dare is online now
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Dan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietDan Dare came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
Quote:
Originally Posted by BERT'S HEAD View Post
Why doesn't he think that he will have a beer ?
It's the bit about disappearing that's the joke. He's saying I think not, instead of just no. As he is not thinking, he doesn't exist. "I think, therefore I am", so if he doesn't think, then he isn't.
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  #215  
Old 05-01-2017, 04:18 PM
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BB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBB Bob came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
I think we have found a whole new basis for the thread - joke analysis! Sorry!
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  #216  
Old 05-01-2017, 04:20 PM
BERT'S HEAD BERT'S HEAD is offline
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I think we have found a whole new basis for the thread - joke analysis! Sorry!
Nah - am just a bit thick, carry on Bob
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  #217  
Old 05-01-2017, 07:56 PM
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mrgins mrgins is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dan Dare View Post
It's the bit about disappearing that's the joke. He's saying I think not, instead of just no. As he is not thinking, he doesn't exist. "I think, therefore I am", so if he doesn't think, then he isn't.
Ah....I see....
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  #218  
Old 05-01-2017, 08:11 PM
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There are two types of people in this world. Those who arbitrarily divide the world into two types of people, and those who don't.
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  #219  
Old 05-01-2017, 09:47 PM
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Biggineagle came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBiggineagle came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBiggineagle came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBiggineagle came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBiggineagle came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBiggineagle came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBiggineagle came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBiggineagle came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBiggineagle came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBiggineagle came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietBiggineagle came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
Quote:
Originally Posted by mrgins View Post
Ah....I see....
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  #220  
Old 05-01-2017, 10:11 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stevek View Post
There are two types of people in this world. Those who arbitrarily divide the world into two types of people, and those who don't.
So you're saying that you're in the first type?
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