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  #1  
Old 06-12-2017, 07:02 PM
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JimmyAG JimmyAG is offline
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JimmyAG came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJimmyAG came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJimmyAG came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJimmyAG came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJimmyAG came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJimmyAG came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJimmyAG came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJimmyAG came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJimmyAG came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJimmyAG came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJimmyAG came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
Ideas for quitting a job....

Hello people. Been in my new job in Stuttgart, Germany for nearly 6 months now, but will quit on Tuesday as they've been complete a'holes (Arschlöcher).

Would welcome your creative ideas for quitting... (nothing xenophobic please)

Here's some inspiration for you...



Looking forward to your suggestions
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  #2  
Old 06-12-2017, 07:07 PM
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Erect a pole and get a couple of strippers in.
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  #3  
Old 06-12-2017, 07:11 PM
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  #4  
Old 06-12-2017, 07:14 PM
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Phil's Barber Phil's Barber is offline
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Erect a pole and urinate on the bosses keyboard.
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  #5  
Old 06-12-2017, 07:30 PM
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Salad_Burnet came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietSalad_Burnet came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietSalad_Burnet came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietSalad_Burnet came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietSalad_Burnet came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietSalad_Burnet came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietSalad_Burnet came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietSalad_Burnet came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietSalad_Burnet came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietSalad_Burnet came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietSalad_Burnet came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
Gather everyone together and deliver a really cutting speech, denouncing everyone you think is incompetent and worthless, but just make sure that in your excitement you forget all their names; start with some light rhetoric - groups of threes, alliteration, disparaging analogies, that kind of thing - but make sure you totally screw it up by an embarrassing use of an apparently made up word; be sure to cry; and make sure you confer maximum embarrassment to those you actually like by exempting them and pronouncing on their good characters.

These things never work out how you imagine, I'm sorry to say.

Even BBS flounces are usually crap, and that's by people who have the option of going over what they've just typed! You'll have no such luxury.
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  #6  
Old 06-12-2017, 07:39 PM
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  #7  
Old 06-12-2017, 07:58 PM
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I wrote a scathing resignation letter once...top stuff it was when finished.

Made me feel better writing it, but wasn't worth the potential debate I may have got in to by actually handing it over, so just did the standard one liner in the end. I suspect the same will happen here!
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  #8  
Old 06-12-2017, 07:58 PM
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foetus eagle foetus eagle is offline
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  #9  
Old 06-12-2017, 08:10 PM
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Ideas for quitting a job....

Tell em you're quitting because you have *won the lottery.

Make some moody cheques out to the people you detest the most for 50,000 Euro's as a parting "gift" and a token of your gratitude for all their support.

Then depart happy in the knowledge that the **** will have spent the 50k in his head long before getting to the bank and having his dreams crushed emphatically.

Last edited by Joe85; 06-12-2017 at 11:06 PM.
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  #10  
Old 06-12-2017, 08:21 PM
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What type of work are you in, and is it likely they might be contacted for a reference in future?

I expect many of us have not written the resignation letter we originally wanted to because we couldn’t risk an employer taking their revenge in future!
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  #11  
Old 06-12-2017, 08:23 PM
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Maidstoned Eagle Maidstoned Eagle is offline
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Write them a letter saying that you have decided to tender your resignation as from today. Thank them for the opportunity and wish them all the best for the future.
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  #12  
Old 06-12-2017, 08:47 PM
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RazorsEdge RazorsEdge is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Maidstoned Eagle View Post
Write them a letter saying that you have decided to tender your resignation as from today. Thank them for the opportunity and wish them all the best for the future.
Agree with this.
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  #13  
Old 06-12-2017, 09:07 PM
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PALACEWU PALACEWU is online now
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It's a trap.
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  #14  
Old 06-12-2017, 09:07 PM
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cpfc4evandeva cpfc4evandeva is offline
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Quote:
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Write them a letter saying that you have decided to tender your resignation as from today. Thank them for the opportunity and wish them all the best for the future.
And then shit in the printer?
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  #15  
Old 06-12-2017, 09:25 PM
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Polish Pete Polish Pete is offline
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Time for Friday attire
White speedos and an cowboy hat and boots. Nothing else
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Old 06-12-2017, 09:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Maidstoned Eagle View Post
Write them a letter saying that you have decided to tender your resignation as from today. Thank them for the opportunity and wish them all the best for the future.
Absolutely this. I did this in the last two jobs (one of which I absolutely hated) and it made it so much easier to go back and get a decent reference.
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  #17  
Old 06-12-2017, 10:57 PM
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It's a trap.
It's the von Trapps.
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  #18  
Old 06-12-2017, 11:36 PM
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Palace Bear Palace Bear is offline
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Palace Bear came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietPalace Bear came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietPalace Bear came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietPalace Bear came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietPalace Bear came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietPalace Bear came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietPalace Bear came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietPalace Bear came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietPalace Bear came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietPalace Bear came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietPalace Bear came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maidstoned Eagle View Post
Write them a letter saying that you have decided to tender your resignation as from today. Thank them for the opportunity and wish them all the best for the future.
This. You never know who they will speak to about you, suppliers/service providers, clients or customers. If word gets out you've been a dick, there's no coming back. Don't know what you do but in my line of work the same people often crop up in different companies and I've specifically told companies I don't want to work with their new employee before because of previous encounters. A bad reputation is much harder to shift than a good one.
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Old 06-12-2017, 11:45 PM
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Pop out for a pipe of Pringles, and never go back.
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Old 07-12-2017, 12:08 AM
Yoda Yoda is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by regal_eagle View Post
Pop out for a pipe of Pringles, and never go back.
That reminds me of my first day working for the BBC near Oxford Circus.

Went out for lunch, misjudged how much longer it takes to walk busy streets and then went down the wrong road.

When I returned embarrassingly late and full of apologies, they were v understanding. I was the youngest by several years and they were actually worried I was either lost or hadn’t liked them and left already!

Ofcourse their concern made me feel even more embarrassed at my stupidity and I was never that late again.
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