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View Full Version : Reasons to dislike Sweden


pubmonkey
24-05-2002, 08:21 PM
it's easy enough with Argentina, Germany, France, etc. but we need to get some motivation for England's first game. I was just trying to think of stuff that I could say to bad mouth the Swedes and I couldn't come up with anything. And before you say Abba or Ace of Base, you can't deny the durabilty of a Swedish pop melody. And the chef from the muppets was cool.

Any suggestions?

ozzieEagle
24-05-2002, 08:22 PM
Yeah swedes taste like crap !!

Skin Up
24-05-2002, 08:23 PM
Give me a B

Give me a R

Give me a O

Give me a L

Give me a I

Give me a N

ozeagle
24-05-2002, 08:24 PM
i have a mat who hiked his way through sweden knowing only the words, you, me hot tub !!!!

ozzieEagle
24-05-2002, 08:28 PM
""being stuck in the roadworked middle lane, missing junction 8, ripping the car through a set of fat plastic dividers, having a huge blue with the missus and getting to wba 30 mins late.""

ohh just noticed this oz...

as long as you were driving a ford rather than a holden, thats ok !!!

pubmonkey
24-05-2002, 08:33 PM
Tried searching for "bad sweden" on Google. It told me that, they're bad at looking after the Lynx, gad at cutting nulear waste, and it also told ne how to buy the Swedish CD of P Diddy's Bad Boy For Life.

The Omen
24-05-2002, 08:36 PM
Their country is nicer then ours! I hate them - even if its just jealousy!

Plus Ulrika shagged our national hero - well he is up until the world cup anyway!

Plus they got Graham Taylor the sack!

AJ1969
24-05-2002, 08:36 PM
Abba

Winston
24-05-2002, 08:37 PM
I have just returned from doing a couple of shows in Sweden.
My loyalties are torn ! When you see the women up there
football pales into insignificance - sorry....:clown:

Son of Selhurst
24-05-2002, 08:39 PM
I met them in France in 1998 and they're a top bunch of lads.

Good luck to them I say.

ozzieEagle
24-05-2002, 08:46 PM
Dammit, i think i found a fair dinkum reason !!!


"you sit on the fence,no good netural undecisive kinky birch switching, free fornicating, roll mop munching, cant make up your mind whether it's dark or not, good looking b....dards"

err i tried !

pubmonkey
24-05-2002, 08:48 PM
Looks as though my fears are justified. They may well be the least dislikeable bunch on the planet.

Although I asked some bloke here at work in America if he could come up with anything and he informed me of a baddy Swedish wreslter called Tor Johnson, known in the wrestling world as the, Super Swedish Angel.

Evidently he was in a B-movie called The Beast of Yucca Flats and he "was so obese at this point in his life, a team of stagehands tugging ropes were required to hoist him up and down sand dunes. The non sequitur packed voice-over narration plays like a ransom note, as though someone snipped a sentence here, a word there, threw them all up in the air and then pasted them onto the page: "A man runs. Someone shoots at him. Progress."

Son of Selhurst
24-05-2002, 08:52 PM
Originally posted by pubmonkey
Looks as though my fears are justified. They may well be the least dislikeable bunch on the planet.

Although I asked some bloke here at work in America if he could come up with anything and he informed me of a baddy Swedish wreslter called Tor Johnson, known in the wrestling world as the, Super Swedish Angel.

Evidently he was in a B-movie called The Beast of Yucca Flats and he "was so obese at this point in his life, a team of stagehands tugging ropes were required to hoist him up and down sand dunes. The non sequitur packed voice-over narration plays like a ransom note, as though someone snipped a sentence here, a word there, threw them all up in the air and then pasted them onto the page: "A man runs. Someone shoots at him. Progress."

Don't stop there! Tell us the rest!!!!!

pubmonkey
24-05-2002, 08:53 PM
"you sit on the fence,no good netural undecisive kinky birch switching,free fornicating, roll mop munching, cant make up your mind whether it's dark or not, good looking b....dards"

that's the spirit!

Eagle Kneevil
24-05-2002, 08:57 PM
For giving Telegraph columnists the word "smorgasbord" and letting them loose with it creatively.

jlmatthews
25-05-2002, 12:23 AM
Originally posted by AJ1969
Abba

:D

leekent1
25-05-2002, 12:29 AM
Originally posted by The Omen


Plus Ulrika shagged our national hero

Who? Stan Collymore !!!!!!

Geezer
25-05-2002, 12:36 AM
Originally posted by leekent1


Who? Stan Collymore !!!!!!

Yep, hes gonna be the first black James bond.

nicky
25-05-2002, 04:57 AM
Best way to wind up the Swedes:

"Youre just a small town in Norway,
small town in Norway"

Daniel_Nash
25-05-2002, 05:01 AM
well, i went out with a swede for a long time... and when it ended, i hated her and everything she stood for.. including Sweden itself. But it's a nice place, bit cold and expensive.. but nice enough.

There are no real reasons to hate it, sorry!

The Norway idea sounds fun though,... small town in Norway, you're just a small town in norrrrway...

anti-addick
25-05-2002, 06:20 PM
The Swedes are pretty cool unfortunately so there's not much to hate - especially as they've lent us their best ever manager and he was one of the few in the world that could have got us to the finals from the position we were in.

Plus they have a Summer festival which is to do with sex/love or something around the soltice. Basically if you fail to get laid at that time then you'll never manage it :eek:

If you want to really insult them though, and i'm not much up on Swedish, then try knocking over their drink and shouting (phonetically spelt) "Yavla Fitta. Skavvi SLOSS Ellar" Which basically translates as "f*cking c*nt, I want to fight you/ we should fight now" - emphasise the "sloss" for effect. If they so much as speak, interrupt them shouting "Hold Sheften" in their face. It means "shut up" and a combination of the two will be the most insulting things you can say. If they are Danish then "Hole Keft" is basically the same as the latter.

Geezer
26-05-2002, 12:43 AM
GO IN GER LAND!!!!!!!!!!!