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  #41  
Old 18-07-2019, 01:29 PM
cantspell cantspell is offline
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Divorce Family Law help #2 - Expense

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Originally Posted by Am Phibian View Post
I can! Haven’t got the strength at the mo’ but will find it. Do I have to send an ‘invitation to attend mediation’ to her (she’ll refuse) before I can go myself? I’ll find out.


No, you can just attend and provide her email address and then they email her.
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Last edited by cantspell; 18-07-2019 at 03:53 PM.
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  #42  
Old 18-07-2019, 01:46 PM
HOVE EAGLE HOVE EAGLE is offline
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HOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
Represent yourself
Badger the life out of her lawyers (solicitors hate to deal with litigants in person )
The judge will make sure you get a fair hearing
Get online with the csa immediately as they wont back date maintenance

Last piece of advice which is really difficult
Don't get emotionally involved and try and step back
Judge will only look at the law not the morals of the case
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  #43  
Old 18-07-2019, 01:47 PM
HOVE EAGLE HOVE EAGLE is offline
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HOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietHOVE EAGLE came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
Oh yes I forgot
You must try mediation first
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  #44  
Old 18-07-2019, 02:01 PM
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Jonboy came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJonboy came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJonboy came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJonboy came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJonboy came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJonboy came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJonboy came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJonboy came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJonboy came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJonboy came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy dietJonboy came here looking for the peace and quiet; the healthy air and the healthy diet
Quote:
Originally Posted by Am Phibian View Post
Although the business has turnover of nearly 18k a month last i heard overheads and debt repayments mean profit is very small...
I am not sure if it will be the same in the UK, but out here the non-business spouse will ask for a copy of the income statement and tax return. They then go through the income statement and question every item. It is not unknown for people to run personal expenses through their business!

This can increase the amount of "profit" available. It can also make her more amenable to settling. She will have the worry that if she is unreasonable you might grass her up to HMRC.
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  #45  
Old 18-07-2019, 03:53 PM
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Divorce Family Law help #2 - Expense

Quote:
Originally Posted by HOVE EAGLE View Post
Oh yes I forgot
You must try mediation first

Exactly that and regarding debt repayment - only the interest payable is an profit and loss item. Repayments of capital are a balance sheet item.

Dig out the original loan agreement and see if you are anyway connected to the company eg are you a director, shareholder?
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Last edited by cantspell; 18-07-2019 at 03:58 PM.
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  #46  
Old 18-07-2019, 04:28 PM
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There's 100% a free mediation service in Exeter. I haven't used it, but heard they are very good. I think there's a hefty waiting list though.
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  #47  
Old 18-07-2019, 05:37 PM
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Originally Posted by cantspell View Post
No, you can just attend and provide her email address and then they email her.
Thanks. Helpful.
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  #48  
Old 18-07-2019, 05:40 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cantspell View Post
Exactly that and regarding debt repayment - only the interest payable is an profit and loss item. Repayments of capital are a balance sheet item.

Dig out the original loan agreement and see if you are anyway connected to the company eg are you a director, shareholder?
I was a director, for her tax purposes, until October last year. Had to counter sign her loan application in 2017. I know this is not good news.
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  #49  
Old 18-07-2019, 05:41 PM
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Originally Posted by Nostrils View Post
There's 100% a free mediation service in Exeter. I haven't used it, but heard they are very good. I think there's a hefty waiting list though.
I'll contact them. Ta.
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  #50  
Old 18-07-2019, 05:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HOVE EAGLE View Post
Represent yourself
Badger the life out of her lawyers (solicitors hate to deal with litigants in person )
The judge will make sure you get a fair hearing
Get online with the csa immediately as they wont back date maintenance

Last piece of advice which is really difficult
Don't get emotionally involved and try and step back
Judge will only look at the law not the morals of the case
Thank you.
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  #51  
Old 18-07-2019, 05:45 PM
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Originally Posted by AndyStreet View Post
Ask your lawyer about fee arrangements they might be able to agree with you, including caps for certain types of work, discounted rates, etc. You should also be asking for detailed estimates at every stage for every type of work and by fee earner involved.

Litigation is not easy and I'd always recommend you instruct someone who knows what they are doing unless it is absolutely not an option (but I would say that though!). Being a litigant in person can create big difficulty for the person themselves, the lawyers on the other side (which can cause you higher costs exposure if you lose in some areas), and the court, so it shouldn't be taken lightly.

There are various charities which either provide pro bono services or can point you in the right direction as a litigant in person. Lawworks is a good starting port of call.
Thank you AndyS.
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  #52  
Old 18-07-2019, 05:55 PM
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  #53  
Old 19-07-2019, 01:19 PM
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Divorce Family Law help #2 - Expense

I represented myself on a complex case a few years ago and it got to a stage where I needed help. I chanced upon an article which described the pro bono work of an esteemed firm of solicitors. They took my case up after I wrote to them and I got the result I wanted.

They are not easy to find but it can be done.
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  #54  
Old 19-07-2019, 06:33 PM
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Originally Posted by cantspell View Post
I represented myself on a complex case a few years ago and it got to a stage where I needed help. I chanced upon an article which described the pro bono work of an esteemed firm of solicitors. They took my case up after I wrote to them and I got the result I wanted.

They are not easy to find but it can be done.
Kidnap them and bring them down next weekend. Ta. Have rung The Law Society today and then spoke to a nice fella at Advocacy.org. A few pointers were given but nothing concrete tho' worth a shot.
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  #55  
Old 19-07-2019, 07:15 PM
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Surely there is an option of maintenence being taken at source and transferred?
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  #56  
Old 19-07-2019, 08:17 PM
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Surely there is an option of maintenence being taken at source and transferred?
There is. The case is still open. It may not fall in my favour as she does pay toward mortgage tho' not the kids specifically. They may count that as Child Maintenance.

What's screwed up tho' is that her income is 3 and a half times as much as mine and doesn't have the kids to look after (thankfully) and I am having to chase her for money which she may end up not having to pay anyway.

However, if it does go my way it will probably £50 a week more than she was paying before she callously stopped.

If that happens then I'm a born again Christian, a Muslim convert and moving to a kibbutz with the kids. Hallelujah! All Hail!! Alluha Akbar!!! Oy vye!!!
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  #57  
Old 19-07-2019, 10:12 PM
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I went through a semi- ok divorce a few years ago and I think I got off lucky. First 'meeting' we had to discuss things between us she asked for £300k ... Told her to **** right off, esp as all the money from the house was mine as I had it before I met her - courts done give a **** though. In the end settled amicably and now have a decent relationship.

Cousin in the other hand his wife went full on nutso over him. Properly went for the jugular. He used a load of lawyers and in the end decided to do it himself using the net and other resources.

Thing is as he had loads of time, he kept bombarding her lawyers with emails and letters daily and seriously racked up her bills - petty but itade him feel better as she was shafting him as soon as her right to stay in the UK was granted.

Might sound mad, but also check out father's for justic forum - he used that a fair bit and they really gave him great advice, though lay off the batman suit thing!

Best of luck regardless!! It's a shitty situation
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  #58  
Old 22-07-2019, 07:35 AM
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Could yous change the mortgage to interest only?
Since presumably you’re gonna sell the home anyway.
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