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  #5861  
Old 02-11-2019, 12:20 PM
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chrisophiex chrisophiex is offline
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Originally Posted by gold76 View Post
The job is quite tough, for a pensions firm, dealing with people at the coal face.

There is a raft of redundancies in the air too (Not my team)

I feel fitter than I have in about a decade, and the running is a great help.

Boozing less and not really to excess, a lot of positive things to look forward to AJ!

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  #5862  
Old 02-11-2019, 12:51 PM
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Originally Posted by catty View Post
Things aren't great. Nothing to do with work, I love my job. I'm just trying to get to the next day.
Let it out on here, don't hold things in. It's anonymous and you may get some good advice from the good people on the BBS.
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  #5863  
Old 02-11-2019, 08:30 PM
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Hi everyone,

Another Walk and Talk planned for the Chelsea match. Nice easy 4 mile stroll this time.

The Arsenal Walk was a real success and great to see so many fans engaging with each other to reduce the stigma of mental health.

Walk would be a great forum for some of the people on here I think. Best wishes Neil
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  #5864  
Old 02-11-2019, 11:02 PM
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Originally Posted by ceeby View Post
Let it out on here, don't hold things in. It's anonymous and you may get some good advice from the good people on the BBS.
The BBS isn't really anonymous. I've taken a few days off which in one way makes me feel worse, but I just can't.
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  #5865  
Old 03-11-2019, 01:28 AM
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Hedgehog Hedgehog is offline
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Originally Posted by ceeby View Post
Let it out on here, don't hold things in. It's anonymous and you may get some good advice from the good people on the BBS.
Catty is absolutely right, the BBS really is not anonymous on many levels, especial for Catty, who I believe has many friends and acquaintances on here past and present.

Somethings are best left to discussing face to face with a friend(s), or with an unconnected professional.
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  #5866  
Old 14-11-2019, 02:44 PM
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Hope everyone is doing well this week.

I feel like I've had the worst week I've had for a while, just feel a bit hopeless and need to get a few things written down, my confidence is at an all time low, and I don't really know where to go from here.

I guess I have two problems at the moment, on top of my previous problems, both kinda work related. I'm coming to the end of a contract role, I'm worried about the next steps beyond this and I feel completely lost and without support (which is really stupid on the face of things, as I currently work for a mental health charity, where generally people are friendly but ultimately there are lots of people who sadly don't practice what they preach across all departments, particularly in my immediate team).

My current contract role is solely to process data imports while the usual person works on a project to upgrade the database used for fundraising income. I don't enjoy the role at all, solely took it to get some money in while I look for other things, I'm not particularly good at it, it's very, very repetitive (literally the same thing every day) and I don't really understand the technical aspects of the role (and have said this, and feel like I'm belittled and patronised when I ask for help) and I spend hours looking at my screen pretending to do work, sitting in silence with my headphones on. The team themselves are all not bad people but also very introvert or a bit unapproachable, no-one ever really speaks (I suspect two members of the team are autistic, I find it really difficult to engage with them, as I'm sure they with me, but I literally haven't had any 'normal' conversation with three members of my team beyond the most basic of work discussion in the four months I've been in the role, even a 'hello, how was your weekend etc'), and my boss is the least supportive and weakest manager I've ever had, which is both made worse by my anxiety and making my anxiety worse - sometimes I send a email asking specifically want I have to do, tell him and be open saying I have anxiety and mental health issues and get nothing back, not even an acknowledgment, let alone guidance. Next week the new database lanches so I won't be able to do my day-to-day work while this is happening, but haven't been told what I doing instead, despite asking on more than one occasion, so feel a bit lost on this front. I went for an internal role a few weeks ago and didn't get it, and suspect I was used as a quota to show they had interviewed other people.

I was 'sick' on Tuesday to attend an interview at another organisation (but had a panic attack on the way to the interview, my first time getting the tube at rush hour for a while) and got the rejection today for that, with the feedback 'you need more confidence' (no shit) and didn't use the STAR technique (whatever that is). Yesterday was genuinely sick but worked from home and had no engagement with the team, today I strolled in at 10am and have had nothing from my boss, not even a hello, are you ok etc? I don't really know what the next steps are from here. I'm 34, don't really know what I'm good at, reject applying for some roles because I don't really know what I want to do. I've got this contract until end of Feb, but I have decided to hand in notice next week and start again in January as I feel it's that bad (I probably have a buffer of around two months income in cash saved) but also mindful I had five months of job hunting from Jan to May this year, reasonably comfortable but have 7k in credit card debt (on 0%) and mortgage commitments. Just at a really low ebb this week. I know things will improve. I'm going to ring the doctors later.

Any other suggestions? I've looked at career guidance websites and personality tests, as I feel I need a job away from sitting at a desk, and it's the one thing I keep going back to, but don't really know what, other than I like walking and travel, so thinking along those lines (in fact, I'm attending a walk leadership training course this weekend, hopefully the first step into volunteering/assessing DofE award expeditions or something like that) but seems a long way off with the fact I need a steady income while I try to work towards this.

Last edited by Webb; 14-11-2019 at 03:00 PM.
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  #5867  
Old 15-11-2019, 10:17 AM
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All the best Webb, I'm now virtually debt free no plastic debt, was once 20k plus in the hole, but used a debt management company called Payplan, it took me 8 years and 30k, but I paid everything off last year, around the time I was made redundant.

I've not been feeling too clever this week, flu wise, it does knock you for 6!
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  #5868  
Old 15-11-2019, 10:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gold76 View Post
All the best Webb, I'm now virtually debt free no plastic debt, was once 20k plus in the hole, but used a debt management company called Payplan, it took me 8 years and 30k, but I paid everything off last year, around the time I was made redundant.

I've not been feeling too clever this week, flu wise, it does knock you for 6!
Cheers, and well done. It's tough isn't it? The debt isn't the big problem really, just more trying to find a purpose and my confidence. I'm slowly chipping away at it and reasonably comfortable asset wise and feel I'm more financially mature than I ever have been. It's not increasing (although it did a bit in Jan to May when I was job hunting, hence wanting to avoid that again!). It's all on 0% interest until 2022 and I can and am currently overpaying beyond the minimum. Half is from circa 2010 when I bought stupid things and never really paid it off, and the other half of it is from my half of paying for solar panels we installed in 2015 so that is getting some money back in long term from the feed-in tariff payments (we got in before they were cut and on about a ten year payback for that), so I'm confident if I get a permanent role it will be gone relatively quickly (two years or so I estimate). Student loan on the other hand......

Last edited by Webb; 15-11-2019 at 10:50 AM.
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  #5869  
Old 30-11-2019, 06:57 PM
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After a number of years I’ve been diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder. It’s both terrifying and somewhat satisfying/relaxing at the same time because finally I know why I have such mood swings
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